NCS 2017- So far

Signing up to NCS, I had high hopes. It seemed like it would be a lot of fun, and it still does, in most ways. The first issue was my slow realisation that none of my friends, nor anyone in my year, was doing it at the same time as I was. “Oh well, it’ll be a grand opportunity to make new friends!” I thought to myself optimistically. My mother assured me that everyone would be in the same position as me, so I remained this optimistic approach.

The day came for the first “keep warm” event. We were told do wear tracksuit bottoms and comfortable clothes, so there I was, rolling up in the car, ready to meet equally awkward individuals, when as soon as I see everyone, the first harsh truth hit. Everyone was wearing decent clothes, and I was there in my shittiest outfit possible. After getting a label with my name on it, I saw groups of people. Groups. Not individuals. Luckily, however, there did in fact happen to be one girl from my year who was there, so I was quite happy with that. She had made friends with another girl, and I spoke to them and hung about with them for the first part of the day. Turned out that almost everyone was from a certain school.

Things only got more shitty as the day progressed; the NCS people were trying to come up with games for us to play to get to know each other. The most painfully awkward of all of these, was a game where we had to make sculptures using ourselves. This involved making a human pyramid. Three lads went on the bottom, and there were a few people left on our team to make the pyramid, myself included. The leader looked around for the two skinniest people, and I was among the two selected. I climbed onto their backs and we made a pyramid. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any more awkward, the next game was group charades. The leader chose that we should be a zoo, so we had to pretend to be animals. Next, we were on a roller coaster. Sadly I didn’t get the memo that we were on the Smiler because half of us went a totally different fucking direction.

Lunch came and we got put in tents. I decided to follow two lads who seemed equally awkward as me, and they weren’t playing football. I hit them with two of my darkest jokes, one of them being incredibly dark, especially at the time, which you can see on r/darkhumour by Boshmash. At the end of that, I had made friends with them, mainly one.

After that had happened, the day improved and was much less awkward, and we did rounders (I was shit),  Zorb football (I charged at my new friend instantly), and some random ass inflatable things (it began to rain a shit ton).

Overall, it was rather the positive experience.

Fast forward to today, the day of the second, and final “keep warm” event. We were doing bowling. I turned up and was hoping to see my new friend. I didn’t. Two people from that friend group were there; a couple who seemed to prefer keeping themselves to themselves. I sat in the middle of two groups, and didn’t speak much at all for the rest of the time there- apart from the things which I did say which weren’t loud enough for anyone but me to hear.

I don’t think anyone has ever looked so depressed and awkward whilst listening to “Sweet Caroline” on that day. So there I was, like a Palestinian turned up to a fucking Israeli tea party. All in all, it was shit.

Thank you for reading this, sorry I haven’t made a post in a while!


Exam invigilators

You know what people piss me off? Exam invigilators.

Obviously, one reason why I don’t like them is because I associate them with exams- which are shit.

Another thing which annoys me: their clothes. Why? Well, many of them wear casual clothes because it is supposed to make us feel comfortable. How the fuck I am supposed to feel comfortable when there is a man wearing a battered tracksuit, presumably on offer from Sports Direct, with the “well-known” brand ‘fadidas’ on them? Exactly.

Another thing which I despise about them is how they are totally unreliable. Usually, they stand around, ears pricked, waiting for a piece of apparatus to fall onto the floor like vultures descending upon a carcass. However, what has happened to me before is this: I reach for my water bottle, my elbow slamming my protractor of my desk, sending it flying halfway to fucking Australia. I glance at the invigilator, attempting to get their attention, but no; they stand there with their eyes glazing over, glancing at the clock as a constant reminder of my time diminishing. Clearly, this invigilator has no idea what they are doing, so I take matters into my own hands: leaning off my chair, I reach out to grab the protractor, my fingers almost reaching it, but at the same time, somebody’s shoe. What does the invigilator do? That’s right, they happily trot over to me in their squeaky trainers, all the while giving me a horrendously brutal stare. They shoo my hand away, pick up the protractor, and spin their heads around like bloody Regan MacNeil, looking down at me in a patronizing manner as they say: “Next time, tell me

Fuck off, I tried alerting you as best as I could (being too awkward to put my hand up for someone to pick something up for me), so how about this, next time you do your laundry, feel free to have a little taste of bleach.

Thanks for reading! 🙂

SLAM Poetry- Dementia

Here is a piece of SLAM Poetry I wrote a year ago for an English class. I got the best marks in the class for it, and yes, it is exaggerated for dramatic effect. The grammar in this piece may not be the best, but remember that this was a spoken piece, so none of that matters. We had to choose from certain starters, and I chose “Life is like a…”

Life is like a whiteboard.

No, scratch that,

The human brain is like a whiteboard.


Anything can be written on it,

Eternally imprinted on the mind.

However, if the wrong pen is used,

It can leave a scar.


The human brain is like a whiteboard,

Anything can be written on it,

But can be erased just as easily.


One wipe and the whiteboard goes blank.

One wipe and all is gone.

One slow, harrowing wipe from dementia.


Suddenly it’s strangers sat beside your hospital bed,

No visits from friends or family.

Strangers holding your hand, day in, day out,

telling of nice things.

Strangers, who hear the final, loud drone from the life machine.


So that was my SLAM Poetry piece. I think tomorrow I will post another thing I wrote a while ago too. Donate to DementiaUK here:

Thanks for reading 🙂

My thoughts on the English school system

As I head into my exams, it got me thinking: “Why?”

*Let me give you some context first. I am talking about English GCSEs. In year nine, we choose some subjects we want to study. However, some of these are compulsory- English, basic sciences, and maths. That’s about all the context you’ll need.*

Well, of course they are useful, but I see many problems within the current school system. Let’s start at my least favourite subject- maths. Firstly, I am terrible at maths, alongside many others around me. I understand the use of basic maths in jobs, but I see no reason why we need to know Pythagoras or how to calculate the angles in a polygon based on the exterior angles. This is why I think that maths should become a choice, because really, unless you plan to go into a job which heavily involves complicated maths without the use of calculators or other things, you shouldn’t have to take it. I think maths (and possibly English too) should be split into two, basic and further. Basic mathematics would involve simple sums, and other relatively simple maths, whereas further maths would be all of the complex things for specific jobs.

I’m not going to go into other rantings on school based upon things such as what topics the school prioritizes, because many videos have already stated most of my points, you can find them here: and here:

I have my Drama exam tomorrow, so I might not be able to post again then. Thanks for reading! 🙂



The last post was quite depressing, so I figure that now I should write something which is a bit more positive- positivity!

I think that positivity is the key to success. Not intelligence, not charisma, not looks, but positivity. The power to remain optimistic through the worst of times is a great power, and one that’ll aid you throughout every stage of life. A positive mindset will get you very far. For example, rather than playing back the events of that job interview you know you messed up on, think about what you did wrong, pinpoint those areas, and hold your head up high as you move on to whatever you’ll try next.

Think about it, negativity makes you negative. Seems like a given, and it is, but that also means that positivity makes you positive. Does this make no sense? Possibly, but the point is that being negative will make you feel negative, resulting in an endless spiral which only leads down.

So really, stay positive through everything, and good things will come to you! 🙂

Age is a restriction

This is my first blog post, and it is going to be quite deep. I started this blog just today, because of immense boredom. Now, while I was thinking about why I was bored, I came across a plethora of reasons. I will be writing about just one of these reasons today: age.

Why age? Well, as you get older, you get more responsibility, so you can do more things. As children, we always get told to try new things, see the World, and enjoy life overall. However, I live in a small town, and there isn’t much going on around me. Where does age fit into this? Age stops us from doing any of the things listed above. You want to get a train and go to that concert? Nope, you can’t be trusted. This same thing applies to almost everything.

So here I am, wasting away my life doing nothing, simply because of a number. People tell me to make the most of my youth, but how can I do so when the same people saying that, are the same people oppressing me? I suppose I will continue to waste my life this same way until I can finally get out of this dull and dreary town, and into a much more fruitful, and vibrant area.